*(A Gnomish Betrayal Banger – To the tune of _Casual_) **(Verse 1)** My guild calls me a loser 'Cause I’m still sticking around. I've heard so many rumors, That I'm just a gnome that you _buff and toss out._ I thought you thought of me better, Someone you wouldn’t lose. You said, _“We’re not bound by magic,”_ So now when we fight, I have **rage issues.** **(Pre-Chorus)** You said, _“Baby, no enchantment,”_ but we’re— **(Chorus)** Knee deep in the dungeon crawl, and you’re stealing my gold, Is it magical now? Two weeks, and your patron offers me a warlock vow, Is it magical now? I know what you tell your friends, It’s magical—if it’s magical now, Then baby, cast Revivify again, If it’s magical, it’s magical now. **(Verse 2)** Dumb love, I love being reckless, Dream of loot we could share. Maybe we’d have a tower, And you’d show me off to your _guild at the fair._ I know, _“Baby, no enchantment,”_ but we’re— **(Chorus)** Knee deep in the dungeon crawl, and you’re stealing my gold, Is it magical now? Two weeks, and your patron offers me a warlock vow, Is it magical now? I know what you tell your friends, It’s magical—if it’s magical now, Then baby, cast Revivify again, If it’s magical, it’s magical now. **(Bridge)** It’s hard being magical When my best invention’s in your pack. And it’s hard being magical When I fix your gear and you don’t give it back. And I try to be the chill gnome, That holds her tongue and lets you raid, I try to be the chill gnome, But honestly, I’m not— **(Final Chorus)** Knee deep in the dungeon crawl, and you’re stealing my gold, Two weeks, and your patron offers me a warlock vow. I know what you tell your friends, Baby, cast Revivify again— **(Outro - Absolute Gnome Rage)** I built you a damn golem and you left me for dead, You _wonder why I hexed you?_ Should’ve seen it ahead. Bragging to your party how you _stole my magic gear,_ Hate to tell the truth, but I _was the brains here!_ I hate that I let this drag on so long—_now I hex myself._ Hate that I let this drag on so long—**you can Plane Shift to hell!** ---